尋死的念頭一出現，我就被自己給嚇到了。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlkLoVe5hWk
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ14DwavT7v
「妳瘋了嗎？」532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2hiplydcJY
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSorVMzFIGx
腦裡出現兩個我，理性的那個正在發飆，狠狠咒罵另一個我。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrAcSsPX1WM
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡf2W8YiTSAc
而被罵的那個我，只是一個勁兒地哭。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡavOgTYTa70
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRKxhFd0cbE
我覺得自己隨時都會爆炸、衝動行事，便躲進被窩，用厚厚的被子蓋住全身，連頭都包在棉被裡，不讓任何光線進來。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ5GS6OEP8C
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1sgkCa0exU
在充滿二氧化碳的被窩裡，我全身是汗，滿臉淚水。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡq7cWJO8x1T
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlkt7Yv4QXP
我側身把臉埋進枕頭，把尖叫送進布料與棉花裡。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0xvw3rEiML
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgHQJp5LSQ9
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3sHGVfWfCs
我往自己的腳下看，有一片草原。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3I3uIRm2M9
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcyGccAjahw
面前有一條石頭道路，盡頭是顆大樹。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuw2CrkcWOG
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBZZiXur7H4
樹下站著一個人，太遠了，我看不清他的臉。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡN4GKsFQbGL
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMwQo9s2IBy
所以我走近，愈走愈近，直到我看清楚他是誰。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpahy4JFKSw
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3sL3ldVCXO
站在樹下的人是英傑。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXoZzBev1HT
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsjRyAhNgQJ
我跑向他，勾住他的手。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEHYp38QZoJ
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLd9440ZpAh
他對我笑著，什麼話也沒說。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeBt5jM9n5L
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtt69OE9XMF
我像是要把這些日子以來，所有發生的事情都告訴他，開始滔滔不絕地講。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkDnifi7cCK
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3wag52nza5
他陪著我走到我原本站的地方，就停下來。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXRKHKMMqUT
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡC5rS8gEY8B
我還在講，他轉頭看我，伸出手揉了我的頭，就像他每次做的那樣。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzMTWoZufBS
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0tZolTsyle
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbUP216eG4t
我張開眼睛，才知道自己夢見英傑了。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWoipS2hIn3
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3OaGNyAHbq
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeI3CMOB4fm
我開始懷疑起自己做這個夢的原因。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnIfp0Yyq5g
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUZmVqW11JH
是太想念英傑了，還是壓力太大需要出口？532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD3mkiXe2j2
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzR1Jo1NADE
或是…他真的怎麼了，才到我夢裡來？532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJf9wFRI7k
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAfhmDUDHWh
我心裡很害怕是後者，但我知道此時的自己無法找到真正的解答。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4MjmZTKN8s
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZK1qM8gWym
這個夢緩解了我的情緒，也瞬間恢復了大部分的理智。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡR0LdwciYDB
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzcjsLWb8HL
不管是什麼原因，都是英傑救了我。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOQLmOiVP3B
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQXRpwYWKV5
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnQtnO2YmLC
我度過了心中的那個坎，日子雖然沒有改變，但我的心態改變了。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡu9J1g8DlBz
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUl0ZC3xEr6
「沒錯，都是我選的。所以，我要更努力才行。」532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1SevJBgg5o
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ68jKITqqZU
雖然，從那個時候開始，過了很長一段借貸的日子。人都說救急不救窮，但我很幸運，擁有很多好朋友，如果我開口，他們總是不說二話的就拿錢給我；就算我死愛面子不開口，他們也會一直逼問是不是沒錢用。我拿著跟朋友借來的錢，繳家裡的房租、水電費、瓦斯費…然後在假日另外打零工還錢。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSQxXbfwN8s
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4XXuGVIIaT
高中的最後一個學期，我也差點因為沒能繳出學費而休學（當時已有就學貸款，但沒有考慮，只想著沒錢就去賺錢，別念書好了），但我那班不知該說是兄弟還是恩人的同學，硬是把一疊鈔票交到我手裡，要我慢慢還，要我和他們一起畢業。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjhRiMVIgA4
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOne56i3RKe
我沒參加考試，畢業後直接去找了工作。我還清了錢，卻欠了好多人情債。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhigGv5bGy2
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG04d93D6uX
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqkvqGFZRZJ
生活條件穩定之後，也談了戀愛，生活圈的人換了幾輪，越來越趨於穩定。
只是在我心底仍有一個空蕩的角落。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzMdPO4IYih
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUYVcqxbiEd
我還是沒有更換手機號碼，一直抱著小小的希望，532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuSWu2aE3QY
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkg9VSp17sf
可我已在心裡默默地接受「英傑可能已經過世了」的事實。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6yp1X4hDIY
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWlImTYfwFU
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJyoli2ZxZr
某天，我的皮夾不知在哪兒掉了，找也找不到。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4mTiWiB4kd
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡK2dibQ78QK
我辦了卡片掛失，心裡希望有人撿到皮夾，會願意送還給我。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhtR7HmvT9t
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBDE4QoUX1w
這時，我才想起皮夾裡有英傑的照片，也想起我們說好要另外拍照留存的事。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW6XXddBtnx
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkNXT4gXrrM
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlH9eFBXQwU
我的皮夾沒回來，英傑唯一的照片也這麼沒了。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKhpQPcAO6X
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9q2ps82hNc
有時候，我會懷疑自己已經忘記他的長相，便努力回想那段日子，但畫面只是越來越模糊。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPBBoakXORb
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpAQEEPcpSx
一年、兩年、三年，當我漸漸淡忘這段過去的時候，我卻看見他了。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiZWMpmJrxm
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9GvohW639d
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk4kz9myk4U
在電視裡面。532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs7ybeMvWP8
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmveTqv548g
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2PePRoOzXf
532Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNRs9SWiVtC
待續。
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