Kat707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTSGstX6k6x
707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLfMFjB8HYN
January 1, 2005
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Same day
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707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEUhWy3pn0C
"That's... not... I wasn't..." I try to explain, but now that the lust haze is gone, I am unable to rationalize my actions. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnHmjBgHOmX
Was that what I was doing? I wanted to stop thinking about everything and I figured with what I heard about Ben, he wouldn't complain. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCw0S8SXczm
"Ugh... I'm such an idiot." I cover my face with my hands. I just want to get out of here. Laying next to him in my underwear after being rejected is so embarrassing. I need to leave.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmVayG3wNkg
He pulls my hands away from my face. His eyes meeting mine. "No, you aren't. You are just hurting."707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkfakdNzBLt
Is that it?707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnznjlRgGQM
When I caught him with that whore, I was almost relieved. Maybe I'm just not processing my emotions properly... 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdkQQwDI17V
I should be devastated. I mean, I am really upset, but I feel more like I'm mourning the life I lost, not the person. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo4kRePirQE
I think he wanted to get caught. He probably hoped I would join in or something.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡiDh8eeCf2g
What a creep. How could I give so much to him? I cannot let myself get wrapped up in another man like that again. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP5t9W9V3kl
I need to be strong. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJF9mMflz8G
707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMrnScEeIV9
I need to be independent. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd2BvpKypgZ
707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTabtYSpiQo
I need to make better choices. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1tp9oeMAPq
I need to... not be here. Crap.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCAgdW6r5q3
Ben makes me feel weak and vulnerable.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpw2rG6U00I
But also powerful and wanted. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtc9pHGhiPW
Ugh... I am so confused. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEmlXPOVmGY
I do know that hopping from one guy literally onto another is not a good choice.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeOOKZgCPVL
I also know that nothing casual can happen with my best friend's boyfriend's best friend. That would be all kinds of complicated. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡusEZ1lxsOz
Hopefully I haven't made things too awkward. Oh god, what if they get married? I will have to see him all the time. I will be reminded of this night forever.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRalwejD7iP
He smirks, tucking my hair behind my ear. "There she is, the wheels are turning again." 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwMvHDFNDuB
I can't help the laugh that bubbles up. I probably sound insane, but this night is all sorts of messed up. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxDYVk6VVXW
His face lights up and his dimples emerge. Crap. His smile turns my insides to jelly.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnRCdjK3zOa
"Come on, Katarina, give the poor little hamster a break. Tell me your thoughts." He gives me a reassuring smile. I'm not sure I like him using my full name, it makes my heart flutter.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9zqJWDQyWn
"I think..." I need a light topic. I just want to ignore my problems. "I think this has been the weirdest night."707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡi7Gqlr3Byz
He nods in agreement. "Weird good or weird bad?"707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡURBC7gcwur
"Hah... Both?" I wince, knowing he's going to prod for more and I don't want to go any deeper.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn1rbzn4RuH
"I am going to have to agree with you." I was not expecting him to agree. "Although, I think yours had a bit more bad than mine." His hand caresses my cheek and I can't help but lean into his touch. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡk2h6aBORGT
I am so weak. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ71GgDH7LzC
"Hmm..." His touch is relaxing and I feel the day catching up with me. The emotions and tears taking their toll on my body. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡhdFR7HJt4s
"You falling asleep on me, Kitty Kat?" I can hear the smile in his voice, but I'm having trouble keeping my eyes open.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBxW3KfIBSn
"I am not a cat." I say, as sternly as I can muster, but it comes out weak. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnt56wP8D0b
"Meow." He chuckles at his own joke.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7sl1M4Y7HJ
"You are so not funny." I mumble.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrNoyQpLXx3
"Oh come on. You're no fun." He tries to tease me, but he doesn't realize just how accurate he is. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrxDshsAY6y
Maybe if I were more fun, things would be different. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCf1VrjxRQo
"If only you knew..." I snuggle into his hard chest, hoping he won't ask anymore questions. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡIEzdx7Gl8Z
I know I should leave, but I just can't bring myself to part with him. I'm sure he's filling some void and I'm being pathetic, but he hasn't thrown me out yet.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpyrSVAOY8O
In fact, he pulls me tighter. Resting his face in my hair. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9kQnlAhDLQ
"Don't worry, I will protect you." He whispers and as I drift off into oblivion, I actually believe him. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgiZzGcYdsq
I awake to the sounds of muffled shouting. There is a heated argument somewhere nearby. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS8ywTP6zPp
When I try to move, I bump something hard with my elbow and freeze. I hear a groan and feel the bed move slightly. I am not alone.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEnkrkCmbaD
Oh no. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe9eDYyXSXQ
What did I do? 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAc5zhjSr70
Scanning the room, I realize I have no idea where I am or who could be behind me.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDBMIkJ86dL
Unless Vanessa is having a really rough morning, that was definitely too deep to be her voice.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡD9qQEVhZ9z
Crap. I am too afraid to look, who could it be? Bits and pieces from the night come to me, but not enough to piece together anything solid.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7BgeELtKmX
I remember crying at some point.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1DtoWzuu8r
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I remember drinking more than I should have.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCjRCd5y6Us
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I remember Vanessa being her usual self. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcIppP0kuuW
707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHYieuk7IzN
I remember her new boy toy stuck to her side. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgvWcJoQV1p
707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFqWpwQ9GE9
And I remember... Uh oh. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJYXZVYOkB7
It couldn't be... I wouldn't... Would I?707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtCfAlzoUBX
Am I really asking myself this after waking up next to some random guy? Well, maybe not so random...707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmEFdc9OkfR
Oh god, this is all sorts of complicated. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtC1aQN6mP7
Okay, I just have to know... I try to roll over gently, without disturbing him. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlREJb2l8nX
I find a pair of amused green eyes staring back at me. A gorgeous grin with dimples on his stupid perfect face. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcwquW7CaNd
Crap. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4XdlVgR4go
I know I'm blushing hard, I can literally feel my face burning. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDr6nyZAxoD
How did this happen?707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPJNHcVSBiu
"You done freaking out yet?" He asks with a chuckle. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ5SNtaUV2y
Is he... laughing at me? 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGWp5HwFATE
"Uh..." And just like that, he has short circuited the connection between my brain and mouth. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡUwm8UXcVI1
"Don't panic." He talks softly, like I am some wild animal that might bite him.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwmU3j1sogs
I am totally panicking. I just can't decide if I want to run out of the room or stay and figure out what exactly happened. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1IfmpMiDhZ
My curiosity wins, just barely. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYIlZ6htR9N
"Nothing happened." I must look really confused, because he feels the need to explain further. "We didn't have sex."707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNh2IdrICWc
"Oh..." I'm not sure if I should be relieved or hurt that he was naked laying next to me.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeTM0HymGDY
Nope. Not letting my mind go there.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ90lvMiESqx
I choose to feel relief. I wouldn't have remembered it anyway. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡalbkRdzfZv
"Not for lack of you trying, of course." He flashes a cocky smirk at me. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlroC04EEj0
I feel a frown tugging at the corners of my mouth, despite my attempt to keep my face neutral. No, I didn't throw myself at him, did I? 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVzZGrVUn7B
I vaguely remember waking up and thinking I heard my name through the wall and then... 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHdyP7EJy0X
"No way... I... Oh god!" My eyes pop open so wide, they begin to hurt.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡTNPyIs17vI
Crap. Did I really climb on top of him? Yep, I was totally grinding on him.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOw8nTBodCK
I gasp, my gaze running down his body before I can stop myself. I take in his muscles, but his bottom half is covered in a sheet. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgRmYgorpI7
His eyes meet mine. "Reminiscing?" 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAuyxERl10r
"What! No!" My voice is too high and rushed to be convincing. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡa9vvOkY1nD
I remember licking his defined chest.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvb5NoREFTx
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I remember... 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxXwh6sRksC
he was naked!707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4FOY4sH5IU
I inwardly groan. I totally touched him. I know how big he is and... 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdCtejsFmgH
Oh god! I know how he tastes. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4Yf0HsYFNk
"Shit." I know it's inelegant, but I can't think of anything else to say.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVkuLD3ddYG
His mouth pops open as his face twists in shock. "Did you just... I can't believe you just said shit!" 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡue2VTmTMNO
"What? Why not?" I sit up, feeling defensive. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ57cHHk22M
Why is he so shocked? He barely knows me. Why does he assume this? Did I say something weird last night?707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYpHBHBja22
"You seemed kinda offended when I cussed, so I guess I just assumed..." He looks shy, almost like he was caught doing something wrong.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcMcI1MB26f
"Based on?" Sure, I don't make a habit of using curse words, but it's more an ingrained reflex than an actual choice. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEsxZyOXqZX
He hesitates, like he's afraid to say and I begin to feel slightly nervous. Crap, what did I say?707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ68luaNr2v6
"You... uh... kinda flinched." He blushes and looks around the room. Insecure Ben is totally adorable. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcgF1r619jb
"Oh." I'm honestly not sure how to respond because I definitely can't tell him the truth. "Well, I wasn't offended."707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡe2ADcUBPf8
"Okay." He blows out a breath, looking up at the ceiling. "If you say so." 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfeeIoulG1y
He looks completely unconvinced but I can't give him more than that. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVey9vuTqYV
"So." He clears his throat. "Not to be totally awkward here..." His gaze drops to the tent of his crotch before his eyes scan the floor. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoQXAEHcq4D
"And not that I would mind laying in bed with you all day." He looks down my body and winks. "But, maybe we should get dressed?"707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbCzqI9SIUl
I look down at myself, just now realizing I'm sitting here in lacy underwear. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfRQOFatGCl
When I don't respond, Ben flashes his smile. "Or not, I mean you look great." 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡsCw806B6VM
I am unable to hide the look of shock on my face before I snatch the sheet to cover myself. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWGTNW7J9vL
Which is no longer covering "Little Ben", if you can even call it that.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡctglriD9kx
Oops.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMNGK8VIp11
Of course that would happen to me! I take a moment to look at it in the daylight and wow, it's like a sculpture. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE8zASCK6mc
Unable to stop myself, I have apparently lost my filter completely around this man. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaqOABwbVQm
"Well hello, Big Ben." I try not to giggle like an immature school girl, but Ben's laugh makes me laugh harder. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡd0V4owr6OZ
"Big Ben, huh?" He grins, making my stomach flutter. He shakes his head, amused. "What am I going to do with you?"707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxuQANmn1Js
My mouth goes dry as my mind conjures up all kinds of things he could do to me. It feels like all the air was sucked out of the room as I struggle to control my breathing. Is it hot in here, or is it just me?707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDVppVwf9E4
My gaze returns to "Big Ben", as it seems to grow, straining to reach me. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnAu4UjbwpC
Prying my eyes away, I meet his green gaze. He's no longer grinning or teasing, in fact, it looks like he's in pain. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNLWxxrgFRf
"So, you like what you see?" His eyes never leaving mine. I try to close my mouth and steady my breathing. I need to keep my composure, but my head nods without my approval. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡo4Qbj0JRKy
I lick my lips, remembering last night. I can't get my mouth to form words.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKY9ZmHQnrB
"Because I wouldn't mind seeing a little more." He reaches forward, tugging down the sheet. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡap78YWj81u
He sucks in a breath. "Fuck, Kat."707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy9O4hHZh1Q
I close my eyes, my insides turning to liquid fire. I love his cussing, like he can't control himself. Maybe it's because of my background and it makes him seem like such a bad boy, but it turns me on, like crazy.707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjO8OFOl1eR
He caresses my breasts through the sheer fabric. "God damn, you are beautiful." 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaVa7AWPpJ9
I absorb his words as another wave of lust hits me. I know this is a bad idea. I know we should not be doing this, but I'm not sure I could stop it, even if I wanted to. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKOe7m9Fysi
His hands move down my body as his mouth meets mine. His kiss is hungry and desperate and I can't get enough. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFddTzQV5BA
His hand grazes me where I'm aching and I nearly explode. I need him. Now. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡanmxvJF48A
"Do you have a condom?" He has to have one in here somewhere, right?707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmSyLoC8APA
He blushes and looks slightly uncomfortable. "Actually..." We both freeze as the sound of yelling grows closer. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡOBta5zWFDF
I pull the sheet up to cover myself just as the door bursts open. All I see Vanessa's fiery hair flying around as she takes the scene before her. "What the fucking fuck is fucking going on in here?" 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0XSjGoGA1f
I know her well enough to know when she can't think, she drops f-bombs. Her gaze drops to Ben's crotch, before he grabs a corner of the sheet to cover himself. 707Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgoHXo0qObS
I can't help the laughter that bursts out of me at the sight of her craziness. "Calm yourself, Vanessa."
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