Brooklyn
My date with Spencer went really well, but the whole time I couldn’t help but think about Luca. I shouldn’t be thinking about him. He knows how I feel and there really isn’t anything more that I can do, so I really should let him go. Easier said than done.
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I woke up this early this morning and started looking for a job that I could get after work in hopes I could actually keep my apartment. I know I shouldn’t be dependent on my mother for financial support, but since i am only nineteen and i only have an internship, i don’t really have much of a choice. I have already gotten a letter from my landlord saying that if I don’t make my rent by this Friday, I will need to be out by Monday of the following week. Today is Thursday so really looking for a job is pointless, but I don’t know what else to do. I don’t have anywhere to go or anyone that even cares at this point. I have tried to call my mom and she never picks up, I’ve left her a dozen messages and she never returns my calls. I haven’t spoken to Nathan since the night he caught Luca kissing me, but it isn’t for lack of trying, he just doesn’t answer or call back.
I decided to push my personal problems to the back burner and get ready for work. I apply a little makeup after a quick shower and put on a light pink dress.
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After I made my way to work, I decided to stop by Spencer's office and thank him for a great time last night. I knock on the door, but no one answers, but the door opens so I decided to sit down and wait for him since I have time to spare. I had just sat down when he came in.
“Brooke, I wasn’t expecting you.” He says surprised
“Yeah, I know, but I just wanted to tell you that I had a really good time last night.” I respond
“So, did I. You want to do it again sometime?” he says.
“I’d love that. You want to have dinner tonight?” I question.
“Yeah, that sounds great. Do you want to come to my place around eight?”
“Your place?” I question.
“Yes, surprisingly, I am a fairly decent cook.” he responds.
“I bet so. I’d love to!”
“Great, so eight work for you?” he says
“Yes, I’ll see you then.” I say as I walk out the door.
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After work, I head back to my apartment to freshen up my makeup and change into something more casual. I decided on jeans and a black floral shirt I picked up last week, when I still had money to go shopping. Spencer texted me his address, but I decided to leave early just to make sure I have plenty of time to find it. After a couple of wrong turns, I finally found it. I pull up to a small, modern styled house, brick and very well kept. I knock on the door and hear Spencer yell “just a second”. When he opens the door he invites me in and takes my coat and clutch.
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“Thank you. Something smells good.” I say
“It's definitely something, but I can’t guarantee it'll be good.” he says and laughs.
“Um should I be scared?’ I question jokingly.
“Yes” He says as we walk to the dining room.
“Great.” I say.
“Here, sit, dinner will be ready in a few minutes.” he says as he pulls out a chair for me.
“Well aren’t you just the perfect gentleman.” I giggle
“Only for you Brooke.” he says and walks towards the kitchen.
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After a few minutes, Spencer returns with a casserole dish.
“Chicken Parmesan, my specialty or really the only thing I can make well.” Spencer says as he sits the dish down on the table.
‘Well, it looks good and smells even better.” I respond.
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Spencer gives me some on my plate as he does on his.
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Instantly I knew that it was good or better yet it was great.
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“This is amazing!” i say
“Why thank you, Brooke.” he laughs
“You are very welcome, Spencer.” I respond with a smile
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After we ate, we had coffee and cupcakes from a bakery down the street. We talked for a long time and it was really nice. Spencer is smart, kind, generous and an overall great person. He could be someone I could have a safe and happy life with, but the thing is, I don’t want safe. I want fire and passion with someone. I want someone that feels a little dangerous and I want to be so in love with someone that it scares me. I want a love that consumes me and I just don’t feel that with Spencer. Nathan and Spencer made me feel the same way. Don’t get me wrong I did love Nathan, but I wasn’t in love with him and I care about Spencer, but I don’t see myself falling in love with him either. This brings me back to Luca. He makes me feel all of the things that I want to feel and more, but for some reason he only wants to push me away. I have told him how I feel and I know he feels the same so I don’t really know what else to do. I want to talk to him again, actually talk not argue.
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