Fading ~ book 2 | Penana

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#37

Fading ~ book 2

urmom

Jul 25, 2020

221

1 分鐘

x

Chapter thirty-four

Jon225Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzmASl03cMn

I feel queasy, sick.

Maybe it was that sushi I had last night.

Deep down, I know why I feel sick right now.

I grip the steering wheel tighter and take a deep breath.

I'm trying so, so hard to control all my emotions, for everyone's sake but......but I feel like exploding right now.

Guilt, anger, sadness.

My stomach is in knots right now. 225Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡKyjbJ9aorC

I don't know what to do with all these emotions.

I'm a nervous wreck right now.

"Drive safe," 225Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡjGmYc6mEYN

Her voice rings through my ears, the memory of her touch.225Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ19eDWn1aGw

No, no, no!

I can't be thinking about her. Fantasizing about her.

It's wrong.

I can't have her, ever.

She is so, so caught up in Matt and everything he is.

His issues.

I know what loving Matt is like.

You love him, you love his problems.225Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn8YcN8N3Ub

He is a complicated mess.

Any second he could unravel.

I know Novah has that weight on her shoulders.

Matt is unstable. Suicidal. An alcoholic with personality issues as well as disorders.

He's all I had, growing up.

I know why he's damaged.

I have my issues but he has more.

Heaps and heaps that you can't see the end of.

The most dangerous thing is when you love him.

His love is so, so toxic. He's abusive in a way.

I know, Novah feels that if she leaves him he will fall apart.

What they have is not a relationship.

Its a codependency.

Or maybe I'm biased.

Maybe, I'm mad, cause Matt has accomplished something that I failed in.

Attaining Novah's love.225Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡS3dgvrSgV3

ns3.138.103.65da2

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Fading ~ book 2

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#28 INTERMISSION