Chapter twelve
Novah
Jon walks into the room a while later holding a glass filled halfway with ice.
"I was starting to think you weren't coming back," I joke.
"Nope. I'm back," he starts rubbing the back of his neck and hands me the glass. "Thank you,"
He stands there awkwardly. "Go ahead. Sit," I say and gesture to the spot next to me, on my bed.
He sits down next to me. I sit upright from my lying position and grab the Gallon of the water off of the floor.
I pour it into the glass over the ice cubes and take a sip. The icy water in my hot mouth. Lubricating my parched throat. Making it nice and wet.
"Mmmm.....that's good," I mumble into the glass. I finish the glass all in one gulp. "Ahh....." I place the cup onto the nightstand and drop the gallon on the floor next to my feet.
"So........" What are we supposed to talk about?
I rest my chin on my hand and stare at him. He flushes red and I laugh. He joins me, laughing nervously.
I slap his arm playfully.
Once we stop laughing there's an awkward silence.
"Thank you for coming here but I'm okay now," I break the silence.
"I don't know that. I'm staying here until Matt decides to get his ass back over here,"
Sadness shadows over my body at the mention of his name.
"He isn't answering his phone. I.....I called him. He won't let me come near him,"
"Matt is very pessimistic and self-deprecating. He always thinks the worst of himself and everyone around him. Its a result of......his childhood,"
"I know....he...told me about it,"
"Hhe did?" Jon stutters.
"Yeah.....I'm....sorry for your loss,"
There's a long silence. "Y'know.....he was never been the same after that, what happened. I take all his shit because he had it way worst than me,"
I look down at the floor. Jon continues. "He found the bodies of both of his little sisters plus mine, which she was also like his sister. He blamed everything on himself. He felt he hadn't protected them. Like, he had failed as an older sibling. After Maritza had committed suicide.....he lost it. His parents weren't paying attention. Their marriage was falling apart. I felt I had to sort of look after him. He's like my brother you know? I take a lot of shit from him just because he's had a hard life. Much worst than I've had it. That doesn't excuse his behavior but in all honesty he.....he's been a struggling alcoholic since he was a teenager,"288Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8IjrD4TMIq
"Jon, what are you trying to say? I love him and feel for him but he's constantly fucking up,"
"You love him?" Jon stutters.
"Of course I do,"
Jon flinches but quickly recovers. "Of course," he replies. "I just wanted to shed some light on why he acts the way he does. He had to grow up fast but he's still mentally and emotionally.....a child."288Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbuRhQyf2dZ
"Okay, Jon. God damn,"
I stand up and walk over to the closet and open it looking for nothing in particular. I'm just fucking angry. I don't know why. Maybe I'm being selfish.288Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJdJEFTkf8y
I am. Matt has had such a messed up, traumatic life, and here I am going on about all the things he's messed up on within our relationship.
I turn around to apologize.
"I'm sorry. I'm being selfish," Jon is standing right there. Face to face with me.
"Don't be sorry," he says softly, studying my face.288Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh0jd22vXYt
He moves a bit closer. I watch him closely, wondering what he's going to do.
His eyes linger on my lips. His pink lips part slightly.
"What was that earlier?" he whispers, his eyes still fixed on my lips.288Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQWSCs6rFM
"What was what?" I ask.288Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtY29MGtHGz
"You were touching me.....like this,"
He places his hand on my waist and pulls me closer.
He tilts my chin up gently to look up at him and runs his finger along my jaw, staring into my eyes.
"What was that all about?" he asks, still caressing my face.
"I don't know," I squeak.
"You can't do thing's like that to a man and not expect to....."288Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzi0UdsU6YW
"Fuck!" Startled, I turn and see Skylar standing there with a disgusted look on her face.288Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdhbhHlnvKT
I pry myself away from Jon quickly.
"I hate Chinese food," Skylar says.288Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡdQFPaElPZa
She walks into the room with a box of pizza in her hand.
"What are you doing here, Jon?" Skylar chirps.
She throws her bag on the bed. Jon places his hands in his pocket.
"I was just leaving. Just came to check on Novah,"
"Leaving already? I brought pizza instead of that nasty ass shit in the corner," she mimics vomiting and I laugh.
He laughs nervously. "Nah I gotta run some errands," he says while picking his baseball cap off of the bed and putting it back on his head, backward.288Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡG3cnpI3w4w
"Okay, then. Bye," Skylar says.
"Bye," He hugs her quickly before walking over and hugging me. "Call me later," he whispers in my ear as we hug.
He walks out the door quickly.
"What's his problem?' Skylar scoffs.
"Umm....I don't know,"
Skylar starts talking but I can't pay attention for my thoughts are jumbled, my emotions are everywhere and I am confused.
I sit on the bed guiltily. What the actual fuck was that?
What's going on between me and Jon?288Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoP1Ia22bjX
