5/19/19121Please respect copyright.PENANA5zbgIil17K
121Please respect copyright.PENANAKCToFQznJE
Nothing eventful happened this week. I ignored that korean guy though he's still sayin hi and I only did small talk with some people around the campus. I didn't like my roommate so if I had free time, I just go to the club and ordered their orange juice since it's only 40 cents. I don't know why it's cheap though, because I could really taste the orange in there. But anyway, I got to know more people in the club and they were askin me if I was applyin to be an exotic dancer. I laugh every time they do it because my grip is so weak, Scott had to recheck if the pole was greasy. Well enough of those self-deprecating jokes! Because I am getting better, but I am not that good yet but if someday I will be that good, well..why not? I mean, people here are nice and the food and drinks are amazin too like what's stoppin me? My fucked up family and my shitty ass degree? Hell no, I won't let that stop me if this is what makes me happy.
121Please respect copyright.PENANAeQdNpBBDhh
5/20/19121Please respect copyright.PENANA1XJ323ouah
121Please respect copyright.PENANAbqsyuXeHqo
Eliot knocked at my door about 4am in the morning and I was so exhausted because of work so I almost ignored him. Of course I was annoyed but then I was surprised because he hugged me the moment I opened the door. I hugged back as tight as I could because I know where he will be going and I told him that I will send letters if my brain let's me remember to do so. He laughed at it but it wasn't like the usual, it sounded really fake; so it felt like a punch in the gut. Then even though my sleep was disturbed, and I was clearly still tired, I was very aware of what happened but I did not let go of his hands when he clutched and caressed them. And I let him make me feel things that I should not feel towards a man as he stared at me. When movies say that time stops when your in love, that is true but it can't be very true because we had to say our goodbyes. While he was exiting in the hallway, I wanted to call his name and just tell him the truth but I saw Raymond on the stairway. I didn't want to start a commotion that early in the morning and they also look so good together.. like they would sometimes act like old couples and I wasn't like a thirdwheel at all, I was like their love child but shit hit the fan and I caused it so, I'm just a bad friend in between two perfect lovers.