***Jays POV***
~past tense~
January
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I'm not about to make it easy for him. I finally got Matty out of the picture and now Ross swings in. I definitely have an edge over him though.
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I've showered and dressed in a shirt, classic white. She likes me in a shirt, I can tell from when we've been out before. I roll the sleeves up, eyeing my tattoos in the mirror. I fiddle with my hair a bit and then decide to just leave it like it normally is.
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I put on some black jeans and a belt. And then grab my wallet and car keys. I will not be drunk around her tonight.
I'm picking her up, that should piss him off.
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I text her when I'm outside and she walks out in a dress and heels. Lord help me control myself, and be cool I think. She gets in the car, saying hi in the sexiest most seductive voice I've ever heard. I notice his car isn’t here and that she locks up and that kinda annoys me. Call me petty.
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"Where are we going, Jay" she asks.
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"You said you liked champagne, we're going somewhere I know that sells champagne" I say smiling.
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"That sounds great" she smiles back at me.
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"I'm going to drop you back though so I won't drink loads, however you feel free to get smashed" I laugh.
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She genuinely laughs back and I smile. I never really thought about dating in this way before. Usually I would just approach a girl and she would just reciprocate. I wouldn't take her places, I wouldn't worry about what I'm saying to her. I wouldn't try to make her laugh or like me. Because I wouldn't need that from any girl. Apart from Taylor.
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"I like that dress a lot on you" I tell her. Her hair is flowing down her back in loose curls, her tight dress showcasing her body.
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"Thanks Jay, I love you in a shirt" she says and then bites her lip.
She's wearing lipstick and I want to kiss her.
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***
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We arrive, I've driven her a bit further out of town. Somewhere a bit different and quieter. She smiles over at me as I park up in the lot.
I quickly go around and open her door for her.
She gets out smiling at me impressed.
"Who knew I would make a gent out of you" she says smiling.
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I stand in front of her and her eyes linger on my lips. Thinking and deliberating. Next she looks into my eyes, I know I'm having a moment staring into hers. Her lashes and blue eyes, they make me feel like I'm drowning in the best way. I don't ignore moments like this. I place my hand on hers, it's not too pushy. It's just right she grasps mine back. I plant a soft kiss on her lips, there's so much heat behind it. She wants me, but I'm doing this right this time. Gentlemanly behaviour.
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I walk in with her, her hand in mine. The place is lined with white roses. It's pretty romantic for me. I picked it because I've been here before and I love it, I want to show her it. I've never taken a girl here before. I'm nervous but I have to come across completely confident.
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We are seated in a booth which is nice and quiet. It's perfect. Today there's a live band, and she beams at me. I thought there might be, I wasn't sure but I'm very glad that there is. I want to impress her.
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They are playing an acoustic set and I can tell she's tuning into what they're doing.
"Thank you Jay" she says once we have two glasses of champagne. They are playing an acoustic version of kiss from a rose. I happen to like this song a lot. They're doing it justice.
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"You're more than welcome" I say.
"I feel like we see each other alot but only in situations where we kind of have to be around each other like university" I say.
"And I want to be around you, I want to get to know you more" I explain
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"Yeah you're right we do only see each other at university" she agrees sipping champagne and wearing the earrings I bought her.
"Actually I have to thank you for being so supportive when.." she begins and then cuts herself short embarrassed.
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Interesting.
"I just mean at the end of last year" she says.
I wait for her clarification. It's something I've learned to do when talking to people.
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"Last year, I don't know whether you realised but you helped me a lot through some kind of difficult stuff" she says.
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"You wanna share" I say leaning into her. Hands open on the table.
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She leans into me.
"You. Are. Irresistible" she says shocking me.
"I don't know how you don't see that Jay, you could be with any woman right now. Three women have clocked you already." She laughs.
"I keep thinking one day I'm going to talk to you and you're going to knock me back uninterested" she explains.
"You will get over me as quickly as you fell" she says finally.
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Now I'm beginning to understand her. I will not she's wrong, completely. I cannot get with anyone because I want her.
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"Taylor" I say clearing my throat.
"You. Are. Beautiful" I say smiling at her.
I pause watching her smile, looking down at her glass which I top up. She doesn't object.
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"I get you, finally" I say and she smiles.
"So I was thinking all this time a lot of different things. You didn't like me back, you didn't think I was good enough, I couldn't make you happy or I wasn't worth your time." I explain relieved.
"But instead you thought I would grow out of this feeling, which I can assure you I will not ever." I explain.
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I let that sink in and she smiles.
"Taylor" I say again when she's looking at me
"I can see why you wouldn't trust me, I get why you would think I would act that way around you" I say
"But I've known you for now, what over a year, and I haven't been able to not think about you in that way. I promise you that I've actually tried to rid you from my life, I've tried to stop feeling anything. And actually I've caused people pain in trying to do that, and I managed to make you think I was some dickhead like Nate" I laugh and she smiles at me.
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"But I really feel like now I can show you myself, I can show you how much I love you" I say and my voice actually breaks a little on that last bit.
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She notices and she touches my hand in hers.
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"I trust you" she says.
That's enough for me. I hold her hands and lightly trace my fingers up and down the side of them.
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